clouds in my eyes

Your say?

time to let go

With every kiss and every hug, you make me fall in love.



~*~





Hellow!

School has been busy mad!


Assignments & presentations piling up just by Week 3 and everything seem to move by in a whizz once again.
My under-eye dark circles seem to prefer to darken itself and the merciless eyebags just hang themselves on me, le sigh!
I'm having tests on Week 5 & presentations as early as Week 6 (I think), I just want to get it over and done with.


This semester has gotten waaayy harder, and today we had this Health Assessment module which ridiculously, requires you to strip so that your partner can examine you physically.

Got into our usual group, Lina, Fad,HuiLin, TianTian & I, and I don't know how I ended up on the bed (oh right, that's because I'm Lina's partner and she can't wait to get started) and became the patient, and everyone was just touching/poking/pressing/tapping my abdomen to measure my liver/spleen/pulse like zomg, wtf.

And then the teacher came along and started to do all sorts of examinations on me and she was literally jabbing me in my sides and I started laughing and squirming and the teacher was like:


"Girl, relax! You're so tensed!"


Sure Miss Lee, I have 5 pairs of hands on me and I'm suppose to lie there feeling relaxed.


Them friends asked the teacher to demonstrate liver span measurement on me and she started poking me all over my chest, and asked me if I mind taking off my shirt.
WTF, TOUCH EVERYTHING ALREADY TAKE OFF LA.


Then she said "You have to take off your bra too."


WTFFFFFFFFFFFF.


Traumatized much, and all of my friends were like "WHAAAAT? ZOMG, ohkay nevermind" zzz.
Cannot imagine the day of real assessment where we have to expose literally everything, I pray hard that my partner does not get the card that says "Breast Examination" WTF.
I swear my life will be over.


Have class from 11 am - 4 pm tomorrow with no break;
Staying back in school tomorrow to do my presentations, joy, how exciting ._.


Anyway.
What's new is that I'm feeling lost in Biology.

Of all the topics, I freaking hate lymphatic system and cranial system.
Hate the whole freaking brain and spinal cord shit, like seriously I would rather open shop and sell flowers.

At least seeing them makes me happy wtf.


And again I question myself, why am I doing nursing.
Hopefully I'll dream of my grandpa tonight and wake up in a bucketful of tears tomorrow and stop whining about why I picked this path wtf.


Not gonna complain, I'm just gonna do what I can.


Moving on.

You know.
I've never thought I'll ever find myself standing in this position
And I'm surprised that I feel pretty much comfortable in where I stand currently.

Refuse to elaborate any further, and if you happen to know about it, I'm not subjected to any of your judgmental comments, I'd rather you just FOAD, thank you.


I haven't been myself lately.
Been shutting myself from people who care about me & am easily irritated with people whom I care about.
I'm becoming all jittery again and have trust issues once more, and I'm sorry if I seem very distant all of a sudden, I'm trying hard to piece myself together again and hopefully, I'll stop feeling so lost about everything.

Wonder when I'll ever stop turning back at looking at what should have been long gone.




Good night, world.
Sleep till you're filled.

if you want to

I hate it when I'm suppose to crawl to school and it starts raining like a _______outside like thanks, sure, go ahead and make the floor nice and muddy, I like it better that way.

Feeling damn ______, I have a huge ass pimple that hurt shit loads at the angle of my mouth wtf, feel damn demoralized, wanna hide my face and don't wanna see the world z.


Lately I haven't been feeling my best, oh boy, where do I start on the list of things that bug me so badly sometimes coming here feels like a mistake.
Don't ask me anything, I'm best left alone these days.



Ugh, I shall stop talking and get my morning coffee.

leave me alone

Some things that I need to let out.


1) I fucking hate people who invade my privacy. They should just fuck off and die.

2) I hate it when I tell the yong tau foo aunty not to fry all my food and then she hands me a bowl of my tofu & brinjal drenched in oil and I end up trying to suck them dry with tissue paper for half of my break time. And she gives me wrong noodles. Fuck, I might as well not eat.

3) I cannot emphasize enough how much I hate it when NOTHING is done and my house & toilet is fucking dirty.

4) I fucking hate ball-less guys who attitude their girlfriends and drive like a prick, like please, if you're going to drive like a motherfucker, do it when you're alone and if anything happens, you fucking die alone and the world has one less dickhead.

5) I hate those stupid aunties who don't know how to line up for toilet and instead, jump queue and exclaim how long the line is and enter the next available cubicle. News flash woman, you're not the only one who needs to pee.

6) I hate it when the secondary school kids invade my school and bump blindly into me like they have cataract in their eyes and block my way when I'm fucking late, and jeezuz, stop playing catching in campus area. What is wrong with you people, I grew out of catching when I was in Sec 1. SHEESH.

7) I hate it when people start talking fucking loudly in lectures and the lecturer continues screaming over the microphone and subsequently giving me the headache of my life, like seriously people, if you can't pay attention, shut the fuck up and go to sleep.

8) I've got issues with people who take credit for things that they didn't do, accepting compliments that are not meant for them, thinking that they are the best and then end up humiliating themselves. Ha, ha. In yo face, bitch.

9) I hate it when I'm damn explosive because I will beat the living daylight out of anyone who provokes me and that I am a bipolar bitch who has massive mood swings and my PMS does not stand for "PRE-menstrual syndrome" because for me, "P" means "permanent". I have it all the time.


Don't touch me.

the letters you wrote to me

Can we push the reset button, and start over again?






~*~


Hellow!

Been MIA-ing from blogsphere lately.
I have tonnes of stuffs to blog about but no inspiration.


Back in Sg for a week now, and first week of school has been hectic.
Class requested for a change of sub-groups so no more working together in our comfort zone and our last minute stuffs which more often than not, rock socks because that's how we roll.
For a week I've met up almost everyday with bimbo or kenehneh or bimbo and kenehneh, but oh well!

Determined to work harder this semester and hopefully I get to go to pediatrics & obstetric ward for attachment.
Signing bond with TTSH this week and I pray it won't be the wrong choice.


Bad day yesterday - multiple happenings crashing in on me when I was having a massive headache leaving me so oversensitive, so raw, and my tears were more than willing to spill anytime but I'm glad each and every matter turned out just fine in the end.

Met kenehneh this morning to pay a visit to bimbo and then met Lina at Bugis, too tired to go to Changi Aloha for chalet, met kenehneh at Bishan for dinner instead.

Everyone is catching headaches these days, I don't know why but I had headaches 6 days in a row starting Monday and everyone else around me seems to have it too.
I blame the weather!





25.09.09 - Clement's Farewell


So apparently everyone else thought I was still in Singapore and Alyssa made me go and surprised Clement, HAHA.

With the Momo Au & Kern Wen, the extra.


Allison.


Ultraman!

Momo.

Kern Wen, Cheryl.


Bye Clement!



29.09.09 - Sister's Bday!


Got issues with this cake.
Dulan.




All 4 of us have issues man.


Family.


05.10.09 - Baby Daniel's Birthday.



One year old :D


I iz want smash cakesxz.

He damn grouchy lor.
Pfft.


HAH, I miss my godson ):


Some random day over at my place;






Back in Sg:

Bimbo & Kenehneh met me at Changi on 19th.
Dinner with them:

Love.




Kenehneh cooked cheng teng for me on some random day!



Yay! I cooked my own lunch :D



Woke up at 8 am to bake today!


Fairy cupcakes.

Yumm!



Headaches are kicking in again and I should be in bed.
Oh well.


I desire a white iPhone 3Gs! ): ):

you're my remedy

Woke up today to an outbreak of black pores hours prior to my flight back, SIGH!
My life is over.


Speaking of flights, holidays has come to an end.

Like, whaaaat?



Can't believe it's been one month already.
Wooaah, chill the mill, time.
You need to take a chill pill and stop ticking by like every second matters.

I need something to put a hold on time.



School starts tomorrow.
Class from 11 am - 6 pm.



God, I'm now in Semester 2.

for no reason

I don't mind being in a dusty place, a messy room, an oily kitchen;
But please,

My toilet must, must, must be clean.


GRRRR.

why risk it?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

superior intellectual status

I crave.

-

I seriously have issues with people who are not parents and talk damn a lot to me.

It's like this constant buzz at my ear side and they're just talking and talking and talking and talking and talking and talking and talking and talking and talking and talking and talking and talking and talking and talking and talking and talking and talking like oh god can't you see I just want to be left alone?


No, really I don't want to talk about school thank you very much, neither do I want to spend the whole night talking about how my attachment was the last sem or how I did in my exams, I just want to be fucking left alone.

And yes, for the record, I am indeed a very anti-social and stuck up person.



Oh God, I hate family gatherings.



My life is over.

thin and crisp

I'm googling recipes for desserts and I see awesome chewy chocolate chip cookies.

As bad as my hands are itching to pick up a whisk and start baking chewy cookies right now, I am once again reminded that I'm cookie-jinxed but no matter how awesome the recipe and comments are, somehow my cookies always end up like shit.

Why is it that people's cookies are chewy and mine end up rock hard?


Lately I've lost inspiration to bake.
Because I fucked up the last thing I baked.

Which was sister's birthday cake.


...



I KNOW RIGHT?!
HOW CAN I POSSIBLY FUCK HER BIRTHDAY CAKE UP?!




This is damn sad.
Shaddap.


Everything else tasted just fine except the base of the cheesecake which was bitter (because I didn't know that bitch of the cocoa powder was THAT bitter) but it ruined the whole cake anyway.


The last time I fucked up was when I wanted to try new cupcakes.



Oh my gawd I'm depressed like worms again.
SIGH.

I blame the supermarket for not having strawberries else I would've baked my usual strawberry cheesecake instead SOBBB.


I'll get over my depression someday.

): ): ):




To bake, or not to bake.
That is the question.

back to basics

Everywhere hurts.


Every muscle of my body aches.
I can't move my hand without my back aching, my butt hurts everytime I walk, my back cracks everytime I bend over, a tonne of imaginary bricks is sitting on top of my chest, my abdominal region aches like I've done a trillion sit ups.
Like every ounce of strength in my body vapourizes into little drops of nothing when I spent the whole day doing nothing at all.
Finally I lie down on the couch and slowly feel every muscle relax as I drift off to lala-land when suddenly my brother tapped me and I jerked.


Owww.

..


Gawd, I hate that time of the month ):

all or nothing

Hello peeps.

I've got a couple more posts to do but I'm so lazy I'll leave it for another day.


Random stuffs:



Bimbo being horrible.
HAHA.


Mother and I had an awesome conversation last week.


She told me about this aunty who's in her 40s and not married, saying that in her younger days, she was damn picky when it comes to guys.

I stoned at her and said, "Mother, you do realize your daughter is the same right?"
She said: "Yes, good for you. You don't need to get married."


I love my mother.


I went online to whine to the bestfs just to find out that they too, have been talking about me and marriage.


"She don't lower standard no need to marry already."
"Yeah, her criteria best. Ask God to custom make for her."



FML.
I'm gonna die alone with 27 cats.




My pride.


Till the next post,
Goodbye!

opening of Joy Estelle

From a close friend to a part time model to Miss Tourism Malaysia to a business student,
I must say, May Suen has never let me down.

In everything she does, she strives to be the best.


She always had a dream of owning an online boutique, and I don't know how she made it happen but now, she's a proud, new owner of her own blogshop - Joy Estelle.



http://www.joyestelle.blogspot.com/


The clothes are pretty and she's her own model.
She has put a lot of effort in this boutique, having cameramen at Desa Park City bright and early to have this photoshoot, editing pictures and what not, so do drop by and support her (:

Anyone from Singapore would like a piece, you can let me know.
I'll place the order on your behalf and bring it back to Singapore and we'll settle the currency thingo - that is, provided that I'm back in Malaysia and my luggage weight stays within 15 kg, hoho.


I've said enough.


Hop on by there now, and lose yourself in Joy Estelle.